Addressing the Clergy

Tomorrow I am off to do a live gig in Chichester at the Diocese of Portsmouth Clergy Conference. They have asked me to impart wisdom to them on matters of an ecclesiastical nature. My talk will consist mainly of drawings that will be projected and I will talk about various in-depth aspects of things. I will be staying there in plush surroundings so there will probably not be a blog entry here tomorrow.

Today I had a look for a pointer sort of a thing to use in my talk so that I can point at interesting aspects of the drawings in a scholarly way. I was after something like this telescopic pointer pen [Link out of date – removed], but I phoned Staples and it is just something they put on their website rather than something they actually stock. The technical name for this is that it is ‘discontinued’. I am aware that these days one can get laser powered pointing devices [Link out of date – removed], but I am from the old school and would prefer a physical stick sort of thing to point. I would probably be a danger to shipping with the laser sort (possibly literally) and could end up shining it inadvertently at an archdeacon who would be caught like a rabbit in one red and quite dangerous headlight.

I had a good look around the garage to see if I had any telescopic pointing devices lying around. In the old days I used to have lots of old stereos which would be very happy to have their aerials ripped off, but in these modern days of ‘throw it away if it is useless’ I am clean out of retractable whathaveyous.

I am sure that some readers have spare telescopic items lying around which I could perhaps borrow, but now it is too late as I am off on the 8.07am as I need to allow goodness knows how many hours to get past London (see diagram).