Instructions on how to ride upon the new-fangled Moving Staircase

Diamond Geezer has this rather splendid guide “for the benefit of visitors to London from flat places like Suffolk who have never seen an escalator before”.

The escalators of London are divided into two halves – one for the ‘left-walkers’ and the other for the ‘right-standers’. Verily must every man and woman decide unto which tribe they will belong. If this be thy first time ascending a moving staircase make sure thou joinest the ‘right-standers’, else shalt thou piss off the ‘left-walkers’ mightily and they will smite thee with savage glares.