Things I learnt at the Basildon A & E

Upon returning with the fish and chips I learned that my wife had had a washing up accident and so we went to the Accident & Emergency unit at the Basildon hospital (she is ok – she has a cut on her hand but not serious enough to prevent her going to work, social activities…

Upon returning with the fish and chips I learned that my wife had had a washing up accident and so we went to the Accident & Emergency unit at the Basildon hospital (she is ok – she has a cut on her hand but not serious enough to prevent her going to work, social activities etc). I spent my evening watching the silent information television screen and I am now aware of the dangers of the following:

  • Drugs
  • Underage drinking
  • Binge drinking
  • Drinking generally
  • Not testing a smoke alarm
  • Bullying
  • Hate crime
  • Using a phone in public
  • Using an ipod in public
  • Starting fires
  • Bogus callers
  • Bogus cash machine readers
  • Anything else that is bogus
  • Flytipping

The fish and chips were eaten 5 hours later. Microwaved and slightly soggy.

7 Comments

  2. He makes it sound like I didn’t really do anything to my hand at all. Let me just say in my defence – there was blood, lots of it and everywhere* including on my nice fluffy white slippers – but not much actually, and the only reason it isn’t interferring with work and social things is because I am fantastic, also it’s not too bad now actually. Aah, that’ll be what he said.

    *OK not everywhere, just in the kitchen, I pulled myself together quite quickly and wrapped, compressed and elevated.

  3. All this from using an iPod in public??! Or have I missed a step here??

    Hope you recover soon, Maddie – and hope you are both recovered from the elevated stress levels.

    Chris

  4. Did nobody warn you of the danger of fish and chips? And microwaves? And eating late? We need someone to take a look at that silent info screen…

    Glad the bleeding has stopped. Terrifying when it happens, of course. “What? Red? Ow! That hurts! I’ve lost a finger! I’ll never play the…oh…wait. No, just blood. Ow.”

  5. Glad to hear no lasting harm… And thanks for teaching me a new word — ‘flytipping’ (not used in Oz so far as I know).

  6. I suggest that you write to your local A+E with a cartoon about the dangers of washing up. Clearly their list is not comprehensive.

    Hope Maddy is better soon. Dave you need to do all the chores for the next month…part of the cherishing bit…don’t let it stop the cartoons though as the effect on the rest of us would be too severe..

  7. I have some rather nice “Global” kitchen / chef’s knives, which my wife and I both use in the kitchen. Occasionally I have urges to make them the sharpest knives in the world (by sharpening them with my whetstone) and after one such occasion my wife was washing up and sliced through her finger to the bone without noticing (until she saw all the blood and felt the sharp pain in her finger).

    Nice.

    I pointed out that the cut was a clean one.

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